Posted by ReyFort Media
A social media post reminding the public to be more sensitive with their remarks toward relatives during family reunions has drawn attention from Filipinos as the holiday season approaches.
On December 9, a Reddit user shared a screenshot of a Facebook post from entertainment news website Philippine Entertainment Portal, which urged Filipinos to “stay mindful and hold back words that might hurt.”
PEP listed common remarks often made during holiday gatherings, especially during Christmas and New Year, such as “Tumaba ka,” “Bakit wala pa kayong anak?,” “Kailan ka mag-aasawa?,” “Dumami pimples mo,” and “Magkano sahod mo?”
“These are the words we often hear at family reunions and Christmas gatherings. Sometimes, the kindest thing we can do is stay mindful and hold back words that might hurt,” the post of PEP read.
The post also included the hashtags “#HolidayKindness,” “#SpreadLove,” and “#PEPInspires.”
“This holiday season, let’s choose sensitivity and compassion so everyone can have a truly Merry and Bright Christmas,” it added.
It also included screenshots of comments made by “It’s Showtime” host Anne Curtis during the December 1 episode of the noontime show, where she told the audience:
“If ever anything na natututunan natin dito, let’s all be a little bit sensitive, ‘di ba? If you have nothing nice to say, just don’t say it at all.”
A Redditor shared PEP’s post on the “r/Philippines” community with the caption, “I will say this in a RELIGIOUS WAY,’ Hindi Ipinanganak si Jesus Christ para tanungin ka ng mga ganitong mga bagay!”
The post has earned 179 upvotes and 35 comments, with others sharing their own experiences.
“Kaya minsan massrap isipin mag-‘back to you.’ Tita: Tumaba ka! Me: Kayo rin po! Tita: Wala ka pa rin BF? Me: Kayo pa rin ng asawa niyong babaero? Lol,” a Redditor wrote.
“Kaya ako ang lagi kong tanong is, ‘Ano ang pinagkaka abalahan mo?’ This is kind, generic, walang kinukwestiyon na katayuan sa buhay, and just plainly interested with the other person. And then the conversation should flow from the answer,” another commented.
“It takes a generation to change. Recently, I had a reunion with fellow millennials, and marami samin never saw each other for a decade. May mga tumaba sa amin, especially after motherhood, pero, no comment at all. Wala rin nagtatanong sa mga single kung kailan sila magkaka-jowa. Mostly tanong sa career, travel, hobbies, family or kung ano ‘yung available information na posted na sa social media,” another Redditor shared.
“Dapat mga tanungan sa reunion — bakit niyo binenta ang lupa? Bakit masyado kayong greedy? Hahaha,” a different Reddit user commented.
“‘Yan kasi ‘di ko maintindihan, lalo sa mga matatanda. Pwede naman kasi manahimik kung walang masabi kesa pilitin mag-small talk tapos ganyan lang din, susko. Meron ako kilala sa relatives namin na walang ibang ginawa kundi pansinin ang weight ng mga tao. As in, parang lahat chine-check kung pumayat o tumaba,” another Redditor wrote.
Family reunions are a big deal for Filipinos, who value close-knit relationships and putting family first. During the Holidays, clans gather to celebrate Christmas and New Year, reconnect, and share festive meals.
Conversations often touch on personal topics like appearance, work, relationships, or family planning. While meant as casual chatter, these questions can feel intrusive or tactless, especially in large gatherings where everyone can weigh in with unsolicited advice.
Psychiatrist Kathryn Tan advised Filipinos that they can respond to such questions or comments with wit or humor to help ease potentially awkward moments during family gatherings.
“Witty comebacks would allow us to set the boundary, say our message, and at the same time, maintain that composure of being the ‘polite’ niece or nephew,” she said in an interview.
“Remember, it’s none of their business, so it can be triggering for a whole lot of people. It’s overly personal to ask anyone why they’re single, or comment about their body,” Tan added. (J. Malasig?Interaksyon)
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